Wednesday, May 6, 2009

One week.

That's how long I have left before I graduate. I've been feeling a flood of emotions as the date looms closer. It's mostly been a battle between excitement and fear.

I am currently at one of those times in life when I'm closing the door on one chapter and opening another. Of course, this brings to mind the big "c" word--change. It's definitely exciting to think about trying new things and getting out of my comfort zone a little more, but it's also pretty scary.

I'll be 20 in about a month, but I'm going to be done with school in two weeks...I don't feel ready to be done. I feel like I should still have two more years to figure things out. Lately, I've been wishing that I could have gone to high school and gone through the same experiences that all of my friends have gone through. I haven't wished that in years. It's frustrating, because I thought I had accepted Heavenly Father's plan for me...I don't want to be bitter and fill my life with regrets and "if onlys."

I don't want this post to be a downer, so I'm going to shift gears and end on a positive note. Let's look at the good things about graduating...

1. I'll be done!! Yay!!! haha, I am really happy about it, I promise I'm not all doom and gloom! And I'm excited that I get to share my graduation with my best friend and my brother, Chris. And our dad is getting his Master's from NAU this Saturday, woohoo!!

2. I'll be able to work again. I've really missed having a job, but since I made the crazy decision to complete 42 credit hours in a year, I didn't really have time for a job. Be happy in your worrrk! (Bonus points if you can name the movie!)

3. The possibility of a roommate. Since I won't be going to ASU, I may have to switch to another ward. *tear* But I'm thinking of trying to find a roommate in the 5th Ward boundaries sometime in the fall semester. So if I do have to say goodbye to my wonderful ward family, it'll probably only be for the summer. And we can still keep in touch until then!

4. A mission...? This is still way, way, way up in the air, mostly due to timing. Because I'd be done with school, I wouldn't have to worry about making the transition back into study mode. I've talked about the possibility a bit with my parents, and they think if I do go, that I shouldn't leave when I'm 21, but that I should stick with my job for awhile (if I find one I like) so that I'll have something for when I come back home. But I have been seriously considering a mission since pretty much right after I was baptized. I'm so grateful for missionary work, because I know without it, I wouldn't be who I am today...I really want to give something back and help others find the same joy I have found.

So there you go. A sneak peek at the workings of Rebecca's brain, lol.